FPQ #64: Who Am I, Really?

It’s Wednesday, which means Fandango asks his provocative question of the week!

Are you the same person on your blog as you are in real life? Do you like yourself more in the virtual world than you do in the real world?

I’m not much good at pretending and I am generally quite open about my life, in reality and on my blog. But I do hold back some details online because you never know who’s trolling out there in cyberspace. My blog name is not, of course, my real name, but it is related to it. Some people who follow me more diligently (ahem!) probably know my name, but usually on my blog, people just refer to me as “Amoralegria.” Anyone who speaks Spanish or Portuguese knows what this means, and its English equivalent is my maiden last name.

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Swan love

Although I enjoy answering the questions posts online, like this weekly provocative question or Share Your World, I tend to show my best self on my blog and I won’t finish them if I don’t like what I wrote. I have done a lot of writing, but I find that written posts don’t get as many hits, so if I do write a narrative about something, I add photos, either my own or from Google. I learned this in a summer weeklong seminar about writing online. I do in fact love to write, and most people who have read my stuff say it’s good. For most of my life, I wanted to become a writer, but realized it was too much trouble, so I just do it for me, or for this blog, or my writing group.

I tend to put my best foot forward on here – I do a lot of photo challenges, because I get more hits, and I usually search for the most appropriate photos from my vast collection of photos, so I make sure to feature the “best” ones. Anyone who has seen the photos I post would probably say I’m a decent or average photographer, which is how I see myself. I don’t have a fancy camera with lots of zoom lenses nor good photo software, and don’t know if I would take the time to really get good at using it if I did. Still, I love photography and have been doing it since I was a kid.

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My first daffodils at our new house

 

I am a creative person, which other bloggers (hopefully) have noticed by now: my three best talents are writing, drawing and photography. Of the three, I’m probably best at drawing, but I rarely post the drawings I do. If I thought that working to perfect any of these things would earn me lots of followers and “hits,” I probably would work on it. However, because I have ADHD, I get gung-ho on projects but don’t finish the majority of them.

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Disorganized hotel room

As a blogger, I thrive on comments and likes, and in general, I get the best response from “photo essays” – writing a narrative with more photos than writing, and the photos support the theme. I think this is true of me in real life, also – I thrive on positive comments from other people. This is primarily because I am insecure and don’t believe in my abilities, so I depend on others to boost my ego.

On my blog, I tend to give people what past feedback has told me they want. And that’s photography. Since I always have at least my cellphone with me, I’m happy to oblige. I take a LOT of photos.

I have occasionally written exceptionally good posts – ones that I’m proud of – after I’ve worked hard on putting them together, sometimes over several days, but if they are not in response to a writing or  photo challenge, I seem to get few likes. So I’m discouraged from doing it more often. This is the same in real life – appreciation motivates me to continue. I also do it as a legacy for future generations in my family.

I enjoy blogging and that’s why I do it. Many likes or few likes, I keep doing it. Really and virtually.

FPQ

FPQ #64

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